Marianne Abravitova, a clinical psychologist, an expert at NLP, said WomanHit.ru why you should not interfere with the child to celebrate the holidays in your company
No. 1. A test of trust.
A teenager is a person who enters into adulthood. If you are confident of his friends, if you trust your child, then you need to release him to celebrate the New year with friends. If you trust the teenager, so he's already ready to celebrate the holidays in your company. The child must be your space. At this age, without exception, all the children try adulthood by heart and want to feel older. Of course, they will be something to try — do not even doubt it, but the good news is that a lot depends on the company and education: if this is not a bad company, then everything will be no negative consequences. The teenager must understand that he is trusted, and the level of its confidence will be tested in the new year's eve: if it let go, so trust him.
Organization holiday party is also a test of samostojatelnosti: Pixabay.com/ru
No. 2. Friendship for the teenager in the first place.
If the child is off to celebrate the New year with friends without an adult, so they already have your script for the celebration. Most likely they thought of everything in advance — several months before the New year. In this scenario, the teenagers put a lot of personal — such things cannot be shared with parents. At the party they can discuss their love Affairs: 12-14 years is a time of first love, that emotional component cannot be compared with any adult sense. Their experiences children usually do not share with their parents, with only the closest with their friends. Friendship among adolescents is one of the most important concepts, because the level of trust between friends in this age of maximum. Friends — the closest people. Do not deprive the child! If he wants to spend the night in the company of those on whom he had no secrets, it wants to let go. It was the best holiday. If you ban him in the New year with friends, forcibly to leave the house, you are literally cut off from it the part of friendship. The strongest relationship is the friendship between the teenagers, carried through life. Do not exert effort to destroy these relationships.
In adolescence, friends become the closest of ludimate: Pixabay.com/ru
No. 3. The test of maturity.
Children in adolescence already feel old enough. If they want to celebrate the New year by themselves, without adults, give them the opportunity to do so. But check conditions: let yourself lay the table, cook, clean the apartment before and after the party. If they manage it, and holiday is possible, for them it will be another step into adulthood. In order to organize a new year party without the help of adults need to show responsibility and independence. And if they succeed, they will be very proud of themselves and feel themselves in a new way: they already are something, are worth something — they are really adults. New year's eve party is a good test for both parents and children. For parents — is one more brick in the upbringing of the child, for a teenager — the test of friendship and friends for strength. Allowing the teenager to organise a new year party, you will understand how your child is grown, his level of responsibility.Follow us on Yandex.The news