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Whether to make a pause in relations

A break often seems quite logical way out of a situation when everything came to a standstill. Psychologist Anna Yotko told if this step is to save the feelings and the return of "good times"

It is assumed that the pause provides an opportunity to rethink the relationship, to understand themselves, to relax and decide what to do next. It is believed that at a distance is especially evident feelings or lack of them. But consider this example: you are doing a home renovation: the mud, the devastation, nor relax normally not, neither to cook to eat. You decide that you are tired of this, collect things and go on vacation, and a week back, and what do you see? The same dirt and destruction. Repair itself can not do exactly the same as the relationship are not able to restore themselves. Therefore, even if after a pause in the relationship you decide to get together with a partner, they return exactly to the same problems that made you break up. The maximum that managed to achieve is to delay their decision. So does it make sense to make a pause?

In fact, the timeout is more like a getaway than a way to solve them. Especially if you parted on a strongly negative note, after a major argument or in anger. In this case, the time apart will be spent on something to cheat themselves and to justify his departure.

Стоит ли делать паузу в отношениях

Anna Yotophoto: materials of press-services

Escape from problems in a relationship often results in the rupture of these relations. However, many fear not so much the fact of the rupture, how the complexities and emotions that accompany it. The timeout in this case seems logical and relatively safe solution. But the timeout can be perceived by your partner as a step towards the gap, and even if you resume a relationship after a pause, feeling that one time you almost betrayed, to forget is very difficult.

What to do if you really want to take a break? If you are tired of problems, tired to sort things out and you physically need a break, you can take an "unofficial" time-out under any pretext to get away for a few days to my parents on a business trip, to visit friends in another city, etc. This option gives you the opportunity to take a breath, think about the situation, cool down and with new forces and thoughts to return. Either to continue the relationship or to get out of them. In this case, you do not put the partner in an ambiguous situation of temporary separation.

Relationship is an interaction. There is no interaction, no relationship. If you value relationships, you value your partner, you'd better not to part with him, and look for new opportunities for interaction, alone or with the help of a specialist.

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