Every woman should be a mystery, experts believe WomanHit.ru Ekaterina Fedorova
Expert WomanHit.ru psychologist-class with 14 years of experience, coach, presenter, sex coach, and a participant of TV programs, author of training books, provocative trainings and tutorials Ekaterina Fedorova believes that every woman should be a mystery
After the wedding the lives of men and women flows smoothly in one direction: common challenges, joint budget, one bedroom. We learn from the books in which the woman has nothing to hide from men and remain a mystery. But how to surprise your second half, after ten years of marriage, when the last card was successfully opened?! What stories to remember and which to leave behind, what to ask and when to postpone the Board?!
There are some topics that are in the interest women to be locked up, not doing this a deliberate secret, but nevertheless, without giving any details. One of the themes — your health. The generation of our mothers and grandmothers were perfectly normal to devote her husband in their sores. Went to the doctor while husband not at home, the abortions done in secret. Even there is a proverb: "Husband needs a healthy wife," so, if the wife's health problems, the husband know about it should not. Things are different now, but in old-fashioned positions of our grandmothers, of course, had their own wisdom. Especially should not be spread about the problems with gynecology. Any, even the most insignificant problems related to gynecology, men scary scary. Moreover, they unconsciously perceive a woman with "women's diseases" as inferior.
The same applies to the birth in the presence of her husband. For some time it was very fashionable, but modern research shows that the majority of men who attended childbirth, loses sexual interest in his wife. Besides practical sense their presence at all. You now need competent experts, not the husband in a semiconscious state. No wonder our ancestors not only did not let husband close to giving birth — midwife he drove outside the village.
Diseases associated with heart, liver, glands and all the rest, not so afraid of men. Although there is no need for superfluous details — it's useless. Of course, if you are sick and need care, it needs to take you: to carry oranges to the hospital, to make tea, to buy medicines etc, but full immersion into your medical history in this case is not necessary.
Another "closed" the theme is your ex. You probably still at the stage of courtship gave him the necessary minimum of information, and most of these conversations do not need to maintain. And it's not her husband, and in you. You do not need to remember about the former and don't need to talk about them — neither with my husband nor with my friends nor with anyone. If you constantly remember your ex, carnivorous to consider foreign men, you will gradually destroy your sense to her husband. Good mental health is when you have chosen your man, and your sexual desire and your heart and your brain focused on it.
With her husband, the situation is reversed — the more you know about him, the better. My husband need to make it a habit to report on what he was doing, where I was, how spent the day. First, you will it's good to know, and hence to understand. This is a plus. And secondly, if he spent three years in a row you talked about in each and every moment of his life is true, then in the fourth year it will be very hard to lie. After all, it is necessary to design a new reality to expend a lot of energy. And, of course, you get more value than the lover because the lover no need to lie. What would he have to lie? Not being married? It still POPs up. About you husband will think you spend more effort, but in the end you will be in a better situation. Just prepare to really talk to my husband and even more to make it a habit might not be as easy as it seems.
We women are more open, easy to discuss their problems, feelings, we can hour in just a hair to discuss. We don't even always matter, with whom: with my friends, colleagues, some people from the queue. We, on the contrary, sometimes too much private information poured onto unfamiliar people. Women are much more likely to attend psychologists, consultants, various courses and trainings. And all men carry, it is difficult at one point to take and to open. They need this train.
Become for her husband therapist that can get him to open up, open up and listen. The wife should be a psychologist, and most importantly the knowledge that a woman should be. Only it is not necessary to philosophize, to frighten the husband of professional terms and shipping of their education, even if you really graduated from a serious psychological institution. You don't need it. But long and detailed conversations about how he spent the day, what happens on the job, who colleagues and partners is necessary. Important — please refrain from advice. Usually the husband is waiting for your support. You can help him to be the right decision, but don't try to impose their own. Ask: "what do you think? What are your options?" Very often the person to find a solution, you need to say out loud their arguments and the arguments — and he will understand where I was wrong and where was right. If you see that he ignores some of the circumstances and therefore makes questionable the decision — pay his attention to these circumstances, but the decision should still take a man.
Do not hurry up to be read the book, leave some of the pages sealed. When the husband knows about you everything, he never ceases to love you, but loses interest.health, expert, ex-boyfriend, relationship men and women