Expert WomanHit.ru the psychoanalyst Alexander Rybinski, Professional member of the International Psychoanalytic Society — about the important rules of communication with his second half
Every athlete knows that to hold the title much more difficult than winning it the first time. Similarly, in life: to bring the relationship to the stage of living together is only half the battle. To experience not was the son of difficult mistakes, consider the most popular ones.
After the triumphant woman crossed the threshold with a suitcase in hand, the space that once fully owned by the man, begin to fill jars with creams, panties with lace and other document folders. It would seem that there is nothing unnatural in this, but after a while all the corners are "paramachina", and the master of the house begins to annoy such a rapid expansion. Now imagine that all of his childhood was spent in the struggle for territory, for example, with her older sister. The last twenty years he tried very hard to forget the feeling of helplessness that accompanied it in those days. But then there was you... Well even if people time realized his reaction and calmly outlined the boundaries. Otherwise, he just wants to get rid of the invader.
Mergers and acquisitions
Speech again will go about the boundaries, but in a broader sense. "I love you, I could eat" — sounds romantic as long as man does not feel that it is really going to absorb. Favorite requires a report of all the contacts and movements, jealous even to a widow-pensioner, wants to have a joint social network account and living together twenty-four hours a day. Most likely, this behavior will cause protest, and momentum will have to slow down. But if you still will be able to make divan neutered tiger cat, the Creator of the first will lose interest in him. For the same reason it is advisable not to be eaten by itself. Just don't forget the end of the digestive process.
"Looking at you in the mirror"
Projection — psychological defense mechanism in which your own traits, thoughts, or emotions are attributed to another person. Very useful when you want to hold someone to blame for their own shortcomings or unacceptable desires. Classic: "you Have sex on your mind" or "Why do you think you should?" If the defendant is willing to swear that he does not think so, the Prosecutor should listen to, does it repressed sexuality, and who he would like to recover a debt.
"My dear, good, guess he"
For some reason some people think they have on their forehead running line, and the people around were completely telepathic. This misconception gave rise to many conflicts. Not so bad if the partner is just waiting for you, as a good mother, the tone and facial expression will know he is hungry, wet or tired. Much worse, if he says not what he thinks or feels actually, in the hope that you will see through his maneuver. For the happiness of your new family do not support these games and don't start them yourself.
"Pig-pig, turned into carp"
If you are suffering, but I hope to alter someone began to live, to leave in the first year — not the worst option for both of you. An introvert won't like hangouts, owl re a lark, and the cat is useless to do the horse. And, most importantly, there is no need. It is exactly somewhere there is a man who suits you in temperament and Outlook. He is also looking for you. And, fortunately, will never change.the expert's opinion, the relationship between men and women